PART 3 of 3: HOW TO BE MODEST.

Have modest body language. If you want to be modest, then you have to look the part. Don't hover over people, wave your hands wildly when you gesture, touch people you barely know with too much confidence, or stand with your hands on your hips and a giant maniacal smile planted on your face. Just stand with good posture, smile when the occasion calls for it, and keep your hands at your sides.

• You don't have to hunch over or look at the ground to be modest. Just don't go so over the top with your body language that people think you're full of yourself

Walk into a room with modesty. If you're modest, then you shouldn't march right into a room like you own the place and start chatting away like the belle of the ball. Stride into a room with confidence, and calmly greet people or give them hugs, but don't show up and throw your hands in the air and cry, "The party's here!" The way you carry yourself, especially when you enter a new environment, can influence how modest you really look.

Dress with modesty. This doesn't mean that you should dress like you just arrived to America on the Mayflower. However, if you want to be modest, then you should avoid clothes that are too flashy and which draw too much attention to you. Wearing obscene graphic tees, neon colors, or zebra or leopard print patterns may not be your best bet. Wear something that accentuates your best features without putting it all out there.

• Women should define what dressing with modesty means to them. There's no harm in showing off a little cleavage as long as you've got it under control.

Avoid flashy accessories. Part of being modest means not acting or looking like you're better than everyone else. So, that $1000 Prada purse or those expensive diamond earrings may have to go if you want to look modest in front of other people. It's okay to own some nice things and to bring them out from time to time, but if you're rolling in with $5000 worth of electronics, jewelry, watches, shoes, and any other accessories that you can think of, then other people will raise their eyebrows.

• Maybe you worked hard for that $1000 Prada purse. It's okay to wear it. But try not to flash it around and show it off, or people won't think you're very

Just remember not to look or be too modest. Modesty can be a positive trait that helps you gain friends, be respected at work, and improve your relationships. Just don't let people walk all over you because you're so busy being modest that you don't even get recognition for what you have achieved, and get overlooked in the workplace or the dating arena as a result.

• There are contested debates over whether the "modest is hottest," mantra is a good one, or whether it keeps women from expressing who they really are. When you decide on your level of modesty, think carefully.

^TIPS

• If you really want people to notice something about you, or if you really want to talk about a problem you have, lead them on modestly. If you changed your appearance say something like "Notice anything different about me?" And don't get mad if they say no. If you want to talk about you, or a problem you have, just start the conversation(but do not interrupt another one) if you are modest, and a good person, they'll help you or talk about that new thing you bought or that thing you did over the weekend. But don't drone on and on. Make it a short conversation, and if it leads into another topic other than you, don't try and pull it back to you, or bring it up again and again.
• If people are rolling their eyes or getting annoyed, or if you're talking about yourself, and everyone looks bored, and no one is contributing to the conversation, then end it, and talk about someone or something else.